


no shame

by bluesxrgent



Series: tumblr prompts [13]
Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Police, Enemies to Lovers, M/M, Tumblr Prompt, and eliott is just trying his best, and stupid, but barely, idiots to lovers, if i write a fic where eliott and lucas aren't stupid as hell call the police because it ain't me, lucas is just an asshole, my favorite tag, pray for them, these bitches gay! good for them!, think brooklyn 99 ish, this is called no shame because neither of them have any
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-17
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:46:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22775860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluesxrgent/pseuds/bluesxrgent
Summary: tumblr prompt: an au where eliott’s in the police force with a b99 vibe; lighthearted & kinda dumb, & he keeps fake arresting lucas for silly things to balance out his struggles with the actual job. example: ”lucas..... i told you to stop torturing me by being so cute...... i can’t keep arresting you for assault against an officer seventeen times a day.” or something like that afjdksdks
Relationships: Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant
Series: tumblr prompts [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1394650
Comments: 14
Kudos: 215





	no shame

**Author's Note:**

> i meant for this to be like 1k words of stupidity and it turned into 4k words of stupidity, which checks out
> 
> hope u enjoy and feel free to send more prompts to my tumblr! (livvyblxckthxrn)

Lucas knew he was in trouble when the megaphone came out. In his defense, he wasn’t even doing anything wrong, or anything at all. He was simply walking down the sidewalk, grocery bags in hand. There was nothing illegal or attention worthy about what he was doing, but he should have known the detective would find him regardless.

Detective Demaury, referred to in Lucas’ mind simply as ‘the detective’ because he was annoying and therefore unworthy of Lucas using his actual name. Lucas could never tell if it was a good or a bad thing they were never around other people when the detective found him. On the good side, it was embarrassing most of the time, but on the bad side, maybe if other people witnessed it Lucas wouldn’t have to deal with the detective anymore. 

The first time Lucas had seen the detective, he’d been worried he was actually in trouble for a crime he couldn’t remember committing. By now, he knew better. 

“Lucas,” the detective sighed through his megaphone. Lucas regretted giving him his name. “I’m afraid I have to take you down to the station.”

Lucas paused on the sidewalk, rolling his eyes and turning to face where the detective’s car was following beside him. He was pretty sure the megaphone wasn’t even police mandated. “What is it this time, Demaury?” 

(He never called him the detective to his face, because he wasn’t  _ rude _ , but he also didn’t call him Eliott, which the detective had told Lucas to call him many times.)

“Theft,” the detective said with a cheesy grin. Lucas rolled his eyes again and started to walk away. This was a waste of his time. Unfortunately, the detective still had a speaker, and Lucas hadn’t walked away fast enough. 

“Because you stole my heart,” the detective said through the speaker, and it was enough for Lucas to halt and turn around, stomping his way over to the cop car. 

As he leaned down to the window, Lucas jeered, “Good one, did you come up with that on your own?”

“I did,” the detective said, setting the megaphone down, eyes bright and blue. It really was a shame to waste eyes like that on someone like this. 

“You need to stop. Seriously,” Lucas said, more adamantly. “Maybe your other conquests thought the whole stalkery cop thing was hot, but if you don’t stop this I’m filing a restraining order against you.”

The detective’s bright eyed dimmed slightly. “Two things. One, I’m a detective, not just any old cop, and two, you’re not a conquest, and I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like you were.”

Lucas snorted. That was rich. How could he not be, when the detective looked like  _ that _ . (Demaury may have been annoying, but Lucas wasn’t blind.) He also didn’t care what the detective thought of him, he’d had enough of pretty men making pretty promises to love him and leaving.

“I don’t care about your apologies,” Lucas said, “I just want you to leave me alone.”

The detective’s eyes dimmed further as he opened his mouth, looking like he was going to argue, then stopped. After a moment, he said, “I’m sorry.”

Lucas was surprised enough by this that he stepped back from the car, barely registering as the detective pulled away from the curb and off into the streets without another word. He felt bad, for a moment, wondering if he’d gone too far before mentally slapping himself. If anything, the detective had gone too far. Cornering civilians in the street was hardly the way to win their hearts. Whatever, maybe this meant he’d never see the detective again.

He saw the detective again, but this time the detective didn’t see him. He wasn’t in his uniform, so he must not have been on the job, or he was undercover or something. Lucas was visiting his mom in the institution she was housed at, something he’d been meaning to do for a while but hadn’t quite gotten around to because he wasn’t the best son in the world. 

When he went back into the lobby to schedule his next visit, the detective was sitting in the waiting room, casually flipping through pages of a book he must have brought with him. Lucas wondered if he was visiting someone too, or maybe he was just there following a lead on some case. He didn’t really know how being a detective worked, didn’t really care. 

His body language looked different, his whole demeanor did, really. He didn’t look half confident, half cocky, he looked human. He looked like the type of person Lucas could envision himself coming home to after a long day, melting into his arms and wondering how he’d gotten so lucky. 

Lucas blinked the image out of his mind as quickly as it had come. What was he doing fantasizing about domestic life with the man that consistently embarrassed him on the street for no reason? What was he doing fantasizing about anyone at all? He had no time or want for romance in his life, he’d been burned enough in the past to know that it wasn’t worth it. 

Still, Lucas waited there in the lobby, even though he’d already had his visiting time with his mom. The detective hadn’t looked up once, but if he had he would have seen Lucas across the room, watching him but pretending like he wasn’t. Lucas busied himself with his phone, trying not to look so obvious. 

After a few long minutes, someone walked out, calling the detective’s name, and he stood, passing Lucas by without so much as a glance. Lucas watched him go, then chided himself for watching him go, then chided himself for even being there to watch him go. 

Much more time must have passed, because soon enough Lucas heard a confused voice saying, “Lucas?”

This time, the detective did see him. Lucas tried not to look flustered. “Not you again,” he said, rolling his eyes. 

The detective ignored him. “What are you doing here?”

“Visiting my mom,” he said swiftly, not really caring what the detective might think about that. The detective’s eyebrows shot up very briefly, but he simply nodded. He still didn’t look like himself, at least the version Lucas was used to seeing. “You?” he asked, when the detective said nothing further.

“Just… stuff,” the detective said inarticulately. 

“Stuff?”

“Detective… stuff.”

Lucas nodded. “Right. Well, I’d better be going, so—”

The detective blinked a few times and took a step back. “Right, sorry.”

Lucas looked up at him, not moving, not saying a word. The detective bit the inside of his cheek, looking up at the ceiling, and Lucas finally regained control over his body, walking to the door. 

“Lucas wait!” 

He felt a hand on his arm, and for some reason he didn’t pull away. The detective was looking at him hesitantly. “Can I walk you out?”

Lucas sighed, finally wrenching his arm from the detective’s gentle grip. “What do you want now, Demaury?” He pushed open the door, knowing the detective would follow. 

“I wanted to apologize,” the detective said, catching up with him, and Lucas stopped abruptly. 

“You what?”

“I wanted to apologize,” the detective said, voice timid but genuine. “If I ever made you feel uncomfortable or anything like that… I’m really sorry. I just see you a lot, and you always look like you could use some cheering up, and with my job a lot of times I need cheering up, so I figured…” he trailed off, shaking his head, “But I went about it in the wrong way. I’m sorry, I’m really not a dick, I swear.”

Lucas didn’t know what to say. The detective shook his head again. “You don’t have to say anything, or forgive me, but I just wanted you to know.”

With that, Demaury walked off, leaving Lucas standing there stricken. Demaury had thought he needed cheering up… It was true, for the most part, but how had he seen Lucas more deeply than most of his close friends?

It wasn’t that his life was bad, but it wasn’t good either. Every day was every day, and Lucas just did the best he could to pretend that maybe someday it would be better. That there would be something to look forward to when he woke up in the morning. He’d had no idea that Demaury might have been feeling the same way. 

Lucas went to visit his mother again the same time the week after, for no particular reason at all. It was extremely likely Demaury would never be there again, but on the off chance that he was… Well, Lucas didn’t totally know what he would say, why he suddenly cared so much. He wanted to tell Demaury that he’d accepted his apology, that was all. 

His mother was surprised to see him again so soon, and he felt a little awful for having stretched his visits out so much that seeing her twice in two weeks was jarring for her. They had a good time, a nice talk, and Lucas left in high spirits, forgetting his ulterior motives entirely. 

This time, Demaury was the one waiting. 

Their eyes met across the waiting room, and suddenly Lucas found his feet carrying him to a stop in front of Demaury, who stood from his chair as Lucas approached. 

“More detective stuff?” Lucas asked. 

Demaury eyed him carefully. “Something like that.”

“Walk me out?” Lucas asked further, taking in Demaury’s surprise. He knew, then, why Demaury had seen him and wanted to cheer him up. He thought Demaury might have been as sad on the inside as he was. 

They maintained a respectable distance apart as they walked out, Demaury’s hands in his pockets, Lucas’ hands swinging by his sides. 

“How’s your mother?” Demaury asked, looking at him sidelong. 

“She’s alright. Better than a few weeks ago, but not her best,” Lucas answered honestly, not sure why he was trusting Demaury with that information. 

Demaury nodded, looking back at the ground. “I know the feeling,” he said, with no further explanation. 

“I forgive you, you know,” Lucas said, “For all the stuff I got so pissed off about… I didn’t consider that you might have been trying to make me laugh.”

Demaury smiled sadly. “I’ve never been very good at comedy.”

Lucas shook his head, arguing, “I’ve never been very good at seeing the best in people.”

They dropped again into silence, steps in line with one another. It was true, Lucas always looked for the worst in people. He didn’t used to be that way, but that was one of the things about growing up, wasn’t it? Losing your idealism, your faith in the world and the people in it? 

“I’ve never been very good at seeing people’s worst,” Demaury said after a while, “Either that, or I don’t want to.”

Lucas had the overwhelming sense that he and Demaury were two sides of the same coin, one hurt by the people they’d mistakenly let in, the other hurt by the people who didn’t even want to try. Lucas said, “I don’t think that’s a bad thing, if that’s what makes you, you.”

“And what’s so great about me?” Coming from Demaury at any other time, Lucas would have scoffed in his face, told him that there was nothing great about him, and that he should just be on his way, but this wasn’t any other time.

“I don’t know,” Lucas admitted, because he didn’t, “But I’m sure there’s more great things there than either of us will ever know.”

Demaury stopped walking abruptly, and Lucas turned back curiously, hoping he didn’t say something wrong. Demaury looked at him with those piercing eyes of his, crease between his brows. “That’s one of the nicest things anyone’s ever said to me.”

And see, when things got too close, too intimate, Lucas ran, shielded himself with wit and nonchalance. “How dare you accuse me of being nice, Mr. Demaury, I’m wholly offended. I work so hard, and this is what my reputation has come to?”

A few emotions flitted across Demaury’s face, looking a bit troubled, but then he melted into an easy smile. “Me, call you nice? I would never. The only nice thing about you is that ass.”

A laugh bubbled its way out of Lucas’ mouth before he had a chance to stop it. Demaury looked pleased with himself, but Lucas wasn’t going to let him off the hook for that one easily.

“That all you got?” he taunted, sighing dramatically through his nose. “No playing the bad cop telling me how naughty I’ve been?”

Now it was Demaury’s turn for a scandalized laugh. “I think you’re confusing me with Santa Claus,” he giggled, a light, childish sound, that warmed Lucas’ insides. He wanted to bottle it and listen to it whenever he wasn’t feeling his best. 

Lucas simply raised his eyebrows and shrugged. “Fine, then, show me your best. God knows you have a lot more where that one came from.”

Demaury cocked his head to one side, lost in thought, and Lucas briefly thought that he was going to refuse, but then he grinned to himself, shaking his head like whatever he was about to say would be the death of him. 

Demaury frowned, looking at Lucas sternly, “Lucas Lallemant, you’re under arrest,” he said.

“Oh yeah?” Lucas said, walking backwards as Demaury walked a few paces behind him. “Why am I under arrest?”

“Assault against an officer,” Demaury said matter-of-factly, and Lucas halted his pace. 

“Wha— I—” he began, and Demaury cut him off.

“You’re torturing me, you see.” He took a step closer to Lucas, bringing them toe to toe. “You’re so cute it’s physically painful.”

Lucas stopped his stammering, melting into a partially relieved, partially exasperated grin. He poked Demaury’s chest, shaking his head dazedly. “Ridiculous. That’s what you are.”

“You asked for it,” Demaury said, picking up his pace once again, passing Lucas by. And, well, Lucas supposed he had. 

“You’re not too bad yourself, you know,” Lucas said, falling back into step beside him. “If you weren’t a detective, you’d make a great Disney prince.”

Demaury put one hand to his chest, stretching the other out to Lucas. “Only if you were my princess.”

Lucas swatted the hand away, trying not to notice the electricity when their fingers touched, even if only briefly. “You think you’re smooth, huh?”

Demaury retracted his hand scrunching his nose and holding his fingers millimeters apart. “Little bit.”

Lucas laughed, loud and clear. They were nearly at the subway station, and Lucas knew this was where they would have to part. He didn’t want them to part, and he didn’t think Demaury wanted that either. But he was scared, at the end of the day, he was always scared. 

“So this is where we say goodbye, then,” Demaury said, nodding to the stairs leading underground. 

Lucas merely looked up at him, thinking that if Demaury told him not to go, he wouldn’t. But Demaury did no such thing, ruffling Lucas’ hair slightly instead and sharing a soft smile. “See you around, Lucas.”

“See you, Eliott,” Lucas said, watching as Eliott’s soft smile turned into a larger one. He wasn’t sure why, all he’d said was goodbye. Eliott took a few steps back, still looking at Lucas, and then he was gone, lost to the masses of people in the city. 

Lucas didn’t make it down to the subway for quite some time.

Lucas wasn’t actively trying to get arrested, but he wasn’t  _ not _ trying to get arrested. He’d gone back to visit his mom the same time the next week, and the week after, but Eliott hadn’t been there either time. He hadn’t really expected him to be, it was surprising enough two weeks in a row, but a part of Lucas was really hoping he would have been there. Against his better judgement, he wanted to see Eliott again, and he wanted Eliott to see  _ him _ .

He hadn’t resorted to calling the police, because that would have been insane, but he didn’t have any better ideas. His little dog, Ouba, started yapping in the corner of his apartment, probably needing to go out, and he had an epiphany. This would be, without a doubt, the stupidest thing he’d ever done, but he was past the point of caring.

By the time he went to the police station, flyers had been printed and friends had been called, warned to go along with whatever story he came up with should anyone ask. 

Idriss Bakhellal was at the front desk when he walked in, and he greeted Lucas with a wide grin. Somehow, Lucas had forgotten Idriss was on the force as well, and now his idea was looking even more stupid. 

“Lucas! Long time no see, what brings you here?” Idriss asked, reaching out to give him a high five. 

Lucas bit his lip, hiding the single flyer he was holding behind his back discreetly. “Um, is detective Demaury in?”

Idriss furrowed his brows. “Eliott? You know Eliott?”

“Not really,” Lucas said quickly, lying through his teeth, “But I spoke to him on the phone earlier, and he said he’d meet me when I got here…”

“Is everything all right?” Idriss looked concerned, and while Lucas appreciated it, he hadn’t planned for this. 

Lucas nodded fervently. “Yeah, yeah, all good, just a missing dog.” He figured if he spoke fast enough, Idriss wouldn’t make out his words. 

“Ouba’s missing?!” 

Then again, when were things known to go his way.

“Yeah, but it’s fine, detective Demaury said he’d help me find her and whatnot so… is he here?” Lucas smiled weakly, and Idriss frowned deeper. 

“Does Imane know? She’d help too,” Idriss said. 

Lucas sighed impatiently, regretting being born. “She does, yeah. She’s helping already with the girls. Detective Demaury?”

“Yes?” a voice said behind Lucas, and he turned around, met with the sight of Eliott in a pair of slacks and a dress shirt, badge hanging around his neck on a chain. His eyes brightened infinitesimally when he saw that it was Lucas.

“Yo, Eliott, this is Lucas, he said you guys spoke on the phone earlier about Ouba?” Idriss interrupted, and Lucas widened his eyes, begging Eliott to play along. 

“Yeah, I was just coming to find him,” Eliott lied swiftly, bright grin making its way onto his face. “Follow me?”

Lucas nodded, thanking Idriss and following Eliott around the precinct. Eliott looked at him with one eyebrow raised. “You know Idriss?”

That wasn’t the question Lucas had been expecting, so he was taken off guard a moment. “Yeah, I’m good friends with his sister,” he answered. Then, as an afterthought, “I forgot he worked here, actually.” 

“Who’s Ouba?” Eliott asked, ignoring the last part of his statement.

Thankfully, Lucas was prepared. He thrust his flyer into Eliott’s hands. “My dog. She’s missing.”

Eliott frowned slightly. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

Lucas gave a tight smile and a shrug, taking the seat Eliott offered to him beside his desk. Eliott continued, “Why, um, did you come here, then?”

“I figured the police could help better than random neighbors I’ve never spoken to,” Lucas said, answers prepared beforehand. They all sounded stupid now, but oh well.

Eliott cracked a soft smile. “Detectives don’t usually handle this sort of thing, you know. A little below our pay grade.”

Lucas reddened furiously. How was he supposed to know what matters were handled by different levels of police workers? He snatched his flyer back. “Yeah, you’re right, it’s stupid, I’ll just—”

“Woah, woah, woah,” Eliott cut him off, laughing. “I didn’t say it was stupid. Ouba means a lot to you?”

Lucas nodded. She really did, he didn’t know what he’d do if she ever actually went missing. 

“Well then of course I’ll help,” Eliott said, like it was the simplest thing in the world.

“Yeah?” Lucas confirmed with a hesitant smile. 

“Yeah.”

Eliott took the flyer back from Lucas, hanging it on the wall of the precinct. “This is a good place to start, a lot of people cycle in and out of here.”

Lucas nodded like it made a difference. He knew none of these people would find Ouba, because she didn’t actually have to be found. Eliott grabbed his keys off his desk and gestured to Lucas. “Come on, I’ll take you home. Maybe we’ll find her on the way!”

“Oh, no it’s no trouble, really—” Lucas began, but Eliott was already out the door. 

The ride wasn’t awkward, not in the slightest. It felt like they would never run out of things to say to one another. Lucas almost forgot that he was only with Eliott because he’d lied about his dog going missing, then wondered what other dumb excuse he’d have to come up with next time. 

Eliott parked illegally on the curb in front of Lucas’ apartment building, and Lucas teased him about abusing his power, making Eliott laugh that beautiful, joyous laugh of his. 

“I’ll walk you up,” Eliott said, and Lucas froze. If he did that, he’d know Lucas had lied about Ouba, and he’d definitely have questions. 

“No, that’s ok,” Lucas said hurriedly, nearly catapulting himself from the car and rushing to the door. He should have expected Eliott would follow as he fumbled with his keys. 

Eliott looked amused, not put off in the slightest. “Everything ok?”

“Perfect. See you around,” Lucas said, trying to slip through the door without Eliott noticing. Eliott did notice, and he caught the door before it could close. He held up his badge to Lucas apologetically.

“NYPD, I need to take you back to your apartment,” he said, grinning cheekily. 

There were two problems in this situation, the first being that Lucas couldn’t call the police, or even threaten to because Eliott was the police, and the second being that secretly, he didn’t want to. Even if it meant he was caught in a lie. He didn’t know when that had changed.

Still, he did try to run, hoping he’d get on the elevator before Eliott had time to catch up. Of course, the stupid outdated elevators failed him, because life hated him, and Eliott stepped on beside him. “Nice try,” he said, then laughed. “What are you hiding up there, a secret collection of beanie babies?”

“If only,” Lucas said to himself, leaning against the wall. Neither one of them said a word as Lucas made his way down the long hallway to his apartment, number 2027. He prayed to any god who would listen that Ouba was asleep in his room and wouldn’t come out to try to impress a visitor. 

The door unlocked and Lucas was met with silence. He let out a sigh of relief. Eliott looked around the otherwise normal apartment in confusion. “This is what you didn’t want me to see?”

“I thought it was messier,” Lucas lied lamely, and Eliott just laughed.

“And here I was thinking you made up a story about your dog going missing to hang out with me,” Eliott joked and Lucas tried not to give himself away. 

“Ha. That would be ridiculous.”

Right on cue, there was a jingle, and that jingle was Ouba’s dog collar as she ran from Lucas’ room to greet the voices she heard. Eliott froze, looking from Lucas, to the dog, then back to Lucas. 

He burst into near maniacal laughter. “Shut the fuck up,” Lucas warned, but Eliott ignored him.

“You pretended your dog went missing to hang out with me.”

“I did not.”

“Really? Because…”

“My friend Yann must have found her and brought her home, he has a key.”

“Why don’t I believe you?”

“Guess you have bad lie detecting skills.”

“Or maybe you’re just a bad liar.”

“Hmm.”

“Hmm.”

Lucas didn’t realize how close they were standing until there was no more than a breath between the two of them. “And what if I did do what you think I did?” Lucas asked, voice a breathy whisper.

“I would say you didn’t need to,” Eliott answered at an equal tone, “I would say that you could have told me anything and I would have run to you regardless.”

Lucas swallowed, noticing the way Eliott’s eyes watched the motion. “Why is that?”

“Because I like you Lucas, I like you an awful lot. And I think you like me too.” Eliott’s eyes were piercing, but steady, as he waited on a response.

Lucas breathed in and out deeply, eyes dropping to the floor, then back up to Eliott’s gaze. “I don’t know how you did it, but I think I like you too,” he admitted, “And if you don’t kiss me in the next five seconds, I think I might explode.”

Eliott obliged him willingly, lips meeting in perfect harmony. Lucas was a lonely soul, but Eliott’s kiss told him that he wasn’t alone anymore. He hoped that his kiss said the same in return. Eliott’s arms wrapped around his neck as their kiss deepened, and Lucas ran a single hand through the beautiful disaster of Eliott’s hair. 

When they broke apart, Eliott was smiling so brightly Lucas thought the sun had made its way into his small living room, lighting up the world anew. “Would you like to go out with me sometime, Eliott Demaury?” Lucas asked.  _ Do you feel it too?  _ he meant,  _ The magnetic pull between us? _

“Nothing would make me happier,” Eliott said, and Lucas kissed him again. Kissed him because he wanted to, because he could. 

“You probably have to get back to work?” Lucas asked a bit grumpily, letting Eliott rest their foreheads together gently. 

Eliott raised one eyebrow. “Oh? Didn’t you hear I have a lost dog to find?”

Lucas raised one back. “Is that so? In that case, you should definitely work on that.”

“Oh trust me, I am,” Eliott said, “I think we should check in your bedroom.”

Lucas narrowed his eyes appreciatively. “You’re absolutely right, we should definitely check there.”

Lucas pulled Eliott by the hand, giggling like a giddy school child. He was ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous. 

“Hey Lucas?” Eliott said, and Lucas glanced up at him “I almost forgot, I need to give you a ticket.”

Lucas paused. “Wait what? You were the one who parked illegally!”

Eliott shook his head, small smirk playing across his face. “You’ve got  _ fine _ written all over you.”

“Oh my god shut up. I hate you.”

Eliott smiled innocently. “I don’t think you do.”

“Nah, I don’t think I do,” Lucas agreed. 

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tumblr: @livvyblxckthxrn


End file.
